When do you seek others advice or guidance on a decision or aspect of your life?

There is wisdom in being connected to people and in relationship with people to keep ourselves aware and in times where we are too close to a situation to be able to be objective in what is healthy, unhealthy or that would set us up for the best outcome in life.

But when does being teachable and open to constructive feedback bleed into people telling you things based on their opinion?

This is a hard topic because there is no getting around the fact that each one of us see life through our life experiences, hurts and successes. There is wisdom in taking  the words of those who are further along in the career we hold, or further along in the spiritual journey we seek, and who have been through things we are currently going through and have come out successful, free and are excelling in their field.

There does come a time though, where we have to come to peace with the path laid out before us and the goal it entails. Even more – that not everyone is going to agree with what that looks like.

I am afraid I’ve harped on the topic of how I believed that people knew how to live life, specifically my life better than I did, and how I spent a lot of energy trying to figure out how to do things the way people thought I should rather than what had been truly set before me.

What does it mean to be teachable? And what does it look like to live off of people’s opinions? 

To answer these questions, we must first understand that though we each have a different world view, we live by these values in an unwavering fashion.

 Seneca puts it this way ” believing in yourself and trusting that you are on the right path, and not being in doubt by following the myriad footpaths of those wondering in every direction.

Christianity puts it this way “Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming. Ephesians 4:14.

The core of this to me is this: Opinions change, and to live by them is unreliable.

Lets think about this.

I don’t like scary movies, but a lot of my friends like them. I could go on a rampage about how scary movies are not appropriate because they cause trauma and give people bad dreams. But my friends may think they are awesome and worth it.

Does that mean that it is a fact that my friends should stop watching scary movies? No.

No matter my opinion on the subject of scary movies, my opinion has no weight or clout on banning scary movies. 

Does it invalidate my reasoning for scary movies? No. But I cannot make  others  believe the same as me on that topic.

Though, my example is futile, the same can be said as to the path people are set on.

If we spend our lives changing our destination based on whether those around us approve of the path, we are destined for misery.

Being teachable is to be able to accept constructive criticism and feedback from those whom we trust, and the maturity to be able to toss that which doesn’t line up with the direction we are heading or the values we hold. But to not be thrown into a tailspin on either end of the spectrum.

So, who do we listen too?

First. Trust yourself, and surround yourself with people who understand where you are coming from, where you are headed and where you want to go.

Surround yourself with people who will be willing to post both the positive possibilities and those you might need to watch out for or plan for.

But mostly, surround yourself with people who, no matter the end destination, they value you and do not condemn you for where you ended up.

None of us have things all figured out. We know what works for our circumstance and we know what hasn’t .

How do you gauge whose opinions and advice you listen too?

Do you need to  evaluate anything? 

Enjoy your life. It’s the only one you have. Learn, grow and challenge yourself.

Be encouraged

Rachael