I get the opportunity to work with people in two specific ways.

I am a counselor, and I meet people daily , who are met with challenges in life. I get to walk with them through and in painful seasons, and offer compassion, support and a non judgmental perspective. Honestly, I feel humbled and inadequate at the same time. But I know that this is the place I am supposed to be. I know that I know that this is my lane . This is where I find joy and fulfillment.

I also work at a local children’s shelter, where kiddos come when they are removed from their homes. I get to meet these sweet babies when life is confusing, and all they want is to go back to the place they came from.  Again, I feel humbled and inadequate here too. But I know that this is the place I am supposed to be in this season. I know that I know this is my lane.

This is where I find joy and fulfillment.

Where does the joy and fulfillment come from?

I don’t find joy or fulfillment seeing people suffer. I find the joy and fulfillment when these people are met with compassion, and someone who will see them for who they are. Their human condition. Their messy life. When they are able to let their guard down and feel safe.

We all seek this. We all , deep down, seek to meet people who will see us. Really see us, and accept us for who we are , and not what life has dealt.

Where does the suffering come in?

Opinions have a lot to do with suffering. Opinions are rooted in judgement and how we think, believe or wish things would go.

Well, that person, wouldn’t have gotten themselves in this situation if they would have made a different choice. Sucks for them, it’s not my fault.

Don’t look at me to help, you chose to be in a relationship with that person. You should have seen it coming. If you would have paid more attention, you would have saved yourself from this. 

These people just need an encounter with Jesus, and they better hurry because they’re going to hell soon. Bless their hearts. 

 

Here’s the deal. It doesn’t matter what you or I think about other people’s choices or ways of living.

Judging people for being in an abusive relationship, or parents for losing their kids to cps, or people chosing drugs over paying bills, does no good.

Having opinions or making judgements on the ways we think people should be living their lives will not make them choose differently, or make the circumstances magically disappear. 

People will not “see the light” because of your opinions and judgements.

 

Let me transition here, and say this. There are skillful and unskillful ways to live life. There are concrete choices we can all make that will ensure that we live healthy lives.

Here is the thing though, Life throws too many curve balls for me to be able to justify ranking my way of living as better or higher than my neighbors. Because, if I took a look at what other people might see in my life, I have no room to judge.

We have this idea of  a ranking system. We rank sins , we rank by how many cars one has, weather or not one rents or owns. How well they keep their stuff.

But here is the hard truth: We cannot control the hand we were dealt in life. And worrying about other people’s choices is taking away energy from you being able to be the best you.

Put yourself in their shoes. Not how you would handle it if you were in their situation. But how , if you were them. How would you handle it?

You can’t . Because you’re  not them. You have no frame of reference for being someone else. Because you are you. Not them.

Just be you to them.

Be a loving you to them.

Be a compassionate you to them.  It works a lot better. … In my opinion. 

 

Be encouraged,

Rachael