Here’s how it is. Plain and simple. Sometimes I live life from a victim mindset. I don’t believe I do it intentionally, but I do think that somewhere early on in life, I took on the identity of a victim of my circumstances and experience, and have a tendency to revert back to that.
I think we all have places in our lives where this happens though. Someone /something told you you were weak, so you walk in weakness, have to get approval for all decisions, and have anxiety attacks until someone tells you they agree with your choices.
Or, Someone/something told you you were lacking, that you were flawed or not normal, whatever that is, and you hung on to that as absolute truth, and now react in a way that makes everything everyone else’s fault . Your power is taken away by a single statement.
So how do we get that back? Well, the generic , churchy , cliche answer here is to say,
We walk in freedom.
But what does that really mean? If you grew up in or are apart of the American church at all these days, you hear this frequently.
“Just walk out of that, and step into freedom.”
“You’re in a season of pruning”
“You’re coming out of the desert” ( Side note, I mean the dry land .. hot .. kind that makes you thirsty, not the sweet kind, just incase it is spelled wrong.) ”
These are all great metaphors and analogies. But Why not just say the truth. These places in life are sucky. Yes, I am about to graduate with a masters and I just said sucky. Deal with it 😉 . These places in life are where the deep , shitty pain is. These places in life are where you question your faith, and the reality of God. These places are where you lose hope, and a Cliche answer of “This is happening for a purpose and God has a plan” just makes it worse.
These are also the places where Satan easily attacks us , and , If we allow him, he speaks lies that could sink us deeper into a pit of self pity and victimization if we allow it.
So, Where is the middle ground?
Honor your pain, your suffering, and have compassion for yourself in this moment. Personally, I am learning the difference between self compassion and self pity and victimization. Let me explain, I can easily get caught in the story of, “I was born set up for failure. ” ” Why would a God create a person who needs him so much” “Thats pretty Selfish” “I am so gross” “I don’t deserve to be happy or successful..” Etc.
We all have these story lines that, though logically we know are not true, we allow ourselves to entertain them, and we find ourselves in miserable pain.
Satan has a way of twisting the truth just enough to make it believable.
Was I born with things that have placed obsticales in my life? Yes. Does that mean my life is or will be horrible and I deserve to suffer? No. But it does mean that sometimes I get tired, and run down, and just want it to stop . But we all have those moments. The way to show compassion in those times, is to stop, refresh, relax and care for yourself in those moments. I mean, I am pretty much rocking life. I am graduating with a Master’s and I get to help people out of dark, painful places. Its pretty awesome.
Here is a revelation I have had lately that I would like to share.
We walk in freedom when we decide that where we are at is no longer more valuable than where we could be.
So , my friends, I want to encourage you in this.
What areas are you hanging on to because of a lie you are believing?
What areas are you playing the victim?
What practical steps do you need to take to truly walk in freedom and not just think about walking in freedom?
Be encouraged,
Rachael
