There are a few pivotal moments in my life that I can look at and confidently say, “this was a critical part of the plot in my story thus far. ”
Now grant it, I hopefully will have many more than I’ve had in my short 28 years of life, but here you go.
First- Going to school for a whopping 1 semester at Wayland: I had just completed my first semester of college at community college. I had always wanted to attend Wayland . Like for real, and I was in a place in life where I needed to find out who I was. I was a giant ball of depression and anxiety, wrapped in anger and insecurity. And I just knew that if I could leave, get to a new place, all of it would go away.
Now though it only magnified it self, I did get connected with a church family that would sow seeds into my life that would minister to those open wounds and would continue to in far more ways that I even knew.
Second- Moving back to Lubbock : Angry, pissed, Angry. Internal 2 year old tantrum throwing at its finest. See, I was supposed to move to plainview , attend my favorite college, and be super happy and successful at life. This. Did. Not. Happen. Life put me right back where I did not want to be. I HATED it . But, little did I know, a lot of healing was about to happen that I wouldn’t trade for the world.
And it happened in the exact place I was trying to avoid.
When I moved back, I did get connected to the campus of my church I found in plainview and, no matter how resistant I was, that Church will forever hold a place of gratitude and upmost respect for its impact on my life. It was there that I found people. People who I was able to figure out who I was with, and who accepted me in that season , mess and all.
Third – Attending Lubbock Christian University: Crap, Id probably cry at this point if we were having this conversation in person. Or make a horrible joke. Either way, a lot happened here.
So , when I moved back to Lubbock, I finished up my basics at a Jr. College, and transferred to LCU to get a bachelors in psychology and Masters in Counseling. So life put me in this environment for 5 years. Upon enrolling in my first semester, I also enrolled myself in counseling at the university counseling center. I knew that, in order to be an effective counselor myself one day, I’d need to be willing to do hard work myself. I figured out a lot about myself during this time, stuff I was excited to learn, like how to better communicate, and how I was coming across to people etc, and how to accept every part of myself. I also learned a lot about myself that I honestly didn’t want to know, but if I was gonna to do the work- it was necessary that I learn about myself in every aspect. Hard things.
But in all of it, I am grateful. I am thankful, and I wouldn’t change my process.
See, the cool thing is, that, within themselves, there is no significant , magical thing about each place or event. Rather, it’s how I allowed each place and event to teach me. I am still in a place of learning today And, even though there is excruciating pain, joy and triumph in each setting, I can look at it now, and hold it gratefully and tenderly.
I’m so thankful for where I’ve been and where it’s brought me. And I am thankful for people that are willing to sit with us and help us sort through our mess, even when it’s hard, tough to swallow. There is only appreciation and gratitude.
Even more awesome- I get to walk with other people in their work. Freaking yes! So honored.
What do the plot points of your life hold? Can you see growth and compassion?
Be encouraged,
Rachael
