I am realizing a lot this week. I have moments where that happens. I think a lot in general. About life, about people and how I can grow and change.
For a bout a week, I have been realizing that I joke and use sarcasm a lot. I use it because it is funny. I like to make people laugh. For the longest, I didn’t even care if they were laughing at me, well, on the outside. People would joke about quirkiness, awkwardness, and I would laugh, and brush it off. But the situation would still hang out in my head. Mindfulness has really put into perspective the things that unconsciously wound me , or have wounded me that I just let pass by without second thought. I would even pick this up, laughing about things just to take the uncomfortable sting away from it. Its a defense mechanism, really. And I am afraid I have probably wounded other people in my joking and sarcasm.
Now, I am not against laughing at yourself, sarcastic remarks , I am just saying, sometimes I have allowed people to go to far in their joking and sarcasm, and I have gone to far myself. I use it when something about myself makes me uncomfortable, so I joke about it so I can brush it off before someone rejects me for it, or rather, I think they might reject me for it. But sometimes, it shows me that I have found a level of acceptance if I can laugh about something that use to bother me.
For the moment, I am aware of places I have hardened my heart , and am using humor to cope with. I will get to a place where I can genuinely look at what that is, and move forward. That is all we can do.
What are some of your defense Mechanisms ?
What brings joy and laughter to your heart?
Be encouraged friends
Rachael
Accepting The Peace 