I am not always one to pick up on things . I am sometimes slow to pick up on jokes, unspoken words, and would rather someone just speak open , clearly and direct with me instead of trying to get me to understand something through beating around the bush. In fact, that honestly is something that bugs me because it is exhausting to try and read between the lines. This is different for me as a counseling intern.
When I am in session with clients , I am often looking and listening between the lines, for that which is not obvious. We do this with our closest friends as well. When we see that people are experiencing pain, emotional turmoil and not at peace, it often takes an outside view, an objective, loving view at our situation to see what is going on at a deeper level. I believe that this is how life was meant to work. I find great joy when I have the opportunity to sit with people in the pain that is covering up what is really holding them back. Even more so, I enjoy going to battle with them and seeing their hard work pay off when they experience freedom from that bondage.
But what about the times when it is hard to understand why people can’t see what is obviously in front of them?
Let me ask you this, Are there times in your life where you know something is not good for you, will cause an experience that is painful? If we are being completely honest, the answer to that question is Yes . So, this is where we put ourselves in other people’s shoes.
Hindsight is 20/20. I don’t know about you, but I have this picture in my head of how I would respond if someone tried to attack me. I would successfully complete the S.I.N.G technique I learned from watching Miss Congeniality, and I would stab them with the keys that were in my hand, and they would not have a chance with me. But in reality, until we experience things , we honestly do not know how we would respond, or what choices we would make in any situation.
Often times , when someone brings us something that we can plainly see the answer too, and we cannot understand why they do not see it our way, it is because we are so far removed from the situation, we don’t really know what it is like. What is the difference here?
Compassion – Compassion, and unconditional positive regard. This is why I love counseling. Counseling relationships are temporary, but I believe this is how our personal relationships are meant to look as well. It doesn’t matter if I agree, disagree, or am indifferent. As a counselor, I am called to meet you exactly where you are, without judgement, and with compassion for the human condition. This is how I aim to navigate my personal relationships as well. Because, that is truly what we are all looking for: connectedness, and someone to say, hey, I see your pain, I love you anyway, and we will move through this together.
Are you able to see your friends for who they are, past their pain? For what is not always obvious? My hope and prayer is that this encourages you to work toward that.
Be encouraged Friends
-Rachael
